Saturday, June 27, 2015

To Celebrate or Not to Celebrate, Isn't Even a Question

With all the hullabaloo over ‪#‎SCOTUS‬ yesterday, the most striking thing to me hasn't been the ruling itself (especially since Canada legalized same-sex marriage ages ago), but how many Muslims (conservative/orthodox) have reacted.
It is bewildering to me that many feel obligated to celebrate a law which doesn't reflect our Islamic moral values in any way. It is also bewildering to me that many feel that *not* supporting or celebrating it automatically makes one a hateful, homophobic bigot.
I really do not understand why so many people assume that believing that something is haraam - e.g. gay marriage - means being a horrible abusive jerk to LGBTQ+ people. We engage on a daily basis with people who commit shirk, which is the greatest crime on the face of the earth; but on this one specific issue, some people seem obliged to morph into the Hulk (but with less noble objectives) and dooming people to hell left, right, and center.
It really is not that difficult to have firm convictions about something and to speak against the haraam (whatever it may be) while maintaining good character and excellent manners. Yesterday, I had an interesting experience - while waiting at the bus stop, my gay neighbour was chatting with me, telling me about the #SCOTUS ruling and asking me questions about niqab and hijab. At the end of our conversation, he told me, "Thank you for always being nice to me even though I know that your religion doesn't accept homosexuality."
I was taken aback, because prior to this conversation, our interaction was limited to "Hi" and "How are you" while passing each other on the street or at the door of our apartment building. Yet what I found most poignant is that yes, people can understand that you disagree with something - and feel strongly about it - without you being horrible and awful to them about it.
As Muslims, we should not feel pressured to outwardly support something that we believe is sinful... and this applies to *all* forms of sin, whether it is shirk, riba, or homosexual acts (all of which are severe in the sight of Allah). Nor should we forget our standard of Ihsaan in all that we say and do, no matter whom we are interacting with.
It's really not that hard.


Anonymous said...

Maybe you're not going out and actively beating up gay people, but you're supporting ideas that make discrimination against gay people possible, and that lead others to think that abuse towards gay people is ok. People like you are the reason that gay/transgender people feel ostracized from their community. People like you are the reason less attention is paid to violence against gay and transgender people. It's the same way how you might not personally be a rapist, but if you talk about how a woman "deserves to be raped" because of what she was wearing, you encourage rapists. People like you are justifying that abusive behavior towards gay people that you speak out against. There's no happy middle ground here.
You are hateful and homophobic, even if you've found a way to justify it to yourself. Don't expect people to treat you nicely when your attitudes enable discrimination against their friends and family.

Here is a great Quora response (the end especially) that talks about the damage of teaching children that it's wrong to be gay: "If you teach your children that being gay is wrong, regardless of what you [are] teaching them about bullying, you are putting at risk gay children who often will end up committing suicide, some of whom are barely 11 years old."

And alternatively, since you probably won't change your mind: you saw the recent ruling, and moreover increasingly Muslims have become more accepting of LGBTQ+ people. How does it feel to know that the world's turning against you, that soon your hateful views will be treated like ancient history, and there's nothing you can do to stop it? :)

AnonyMouse said...

Not sure how you view my beliefs that homosexual acts (not identity) is wrong, as being hateful and homophobic. I abhor violence against LGBTQ+ individuals (or anyone else because of their race/ religion/ identity/ sexual orientation/ gender identity) because it's WRONG, and I would never justify it.
Nor do I believe that it's wrong to 'be gay' - from my own Islamic perspective, I view the sexual acts themselves as being sinful (just as any sexual acts outside of marriage, even for straight folks, is considered sinful).

And, quite frankly, whichever way the world turns, I have my own life and beliefs and I wish everyone else well in living their own. To you your way, and to me mine.

Unknown said...

You're not hateful or homophobic. Don't let stupid fools tell you otherwise.

Mama of Leo said...

Well, to be honest, I am a committed Muslim and an employee of an NGO. Our NGO defends LGBTI people's rights. And always I find myself splitting into two on the inside when this issue is discussed. I was never able to formulate my attitude in words, but now you have collected my thoughts and put them into words!

Yes, this is how we should think. We should never find justifications for these acts. But still, this does not mean that being harsh to them is justified, not to mention killing them!

So yes, I DO NOT celebrate gay marriage. But I would defends a gay's life with my own if he was to be killed for him being gay!