Friday, August 17, 2007

Writing Exercise

It's a bit rough and isn't exactly a great piece, but it was fun to write! :P


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“As-salaamu ‘alaikum… I’m hoooooooooome!” she called out in a sing-song voice, as she swung open the door, motorcycle helmet under her arm. Her mother, Aaminah, setting the table in the dining room, replied the greeting with a disapproving look at her daughter’s getup – what she liked to call her “Muslim biker chick costume”. The “costume” consisted of a long-sleeved ankle-length cape-like leather jacket, buttoned down to the waist until it flared open to alternately hide and reveal a similarly flaring skirt, split at the sides, under which she wore matching leather pants. “Huntress hijab-ified” the Muslimah biker chick pronounced, referring to her DC-comics heroine.

Ignoring her mother’s expression, Sameera relieved her of a stack of plates and completed the chore.
“Where were you?” her mother asked, returning from the kitchen with a pot of steaming stew. “What were you doing?”

“Oh, the usual,” Sameera answered casually. “You know, starting up brawls at the pub and toilet-papering the Masjid.”

“Sameera!” her mother cried out, horrified, and her daughter laughed and kissed Aaminah’s cheek in apology. “I’m kidding, Mom! You know we’d never do that… nah, today we just hung out at the park and gave Da’wah.”

Somewhat mollified, her mother’s expression softened but then became suspicious. “Da’wah?”
Sameera smiled sweetly. “Blowing bubbles, playing with kittens, and beating the daylights out of some drunk loser who tried to rape a teenage girl…”

Aaminah’s eyes widened in horror and she grabbed her daughter’s hands. “Please tell me you didn’t do what you just said you did!” she begged, her face creased with worry.

“All right, so the kitten ran away from us,” Sameera said flippantly, but repented when at the look of anguish on her mother’s face. “I promise, Mama, we’re all okay! And we couldn’t just let that, that animal hurt the girl… Mama, this is our job. This is why we’re a gang of Muslimah biker chicks – the cops can’t be everywhere, and when they do show up it’s too late. This way, we do our civic and Islamic duty of enjoining good and forbidding evil.” She gave her mother’s hands a reassuring squeeze and let go, turning away to leave – but before she could escape, Aaminah caught hold of her sleeve, still anxious.

“What if you get hurt one day?” she implored her daughter. “I wouldn’t be able to bear it. There are dangerous people out there, and Allah only knows what they could to you – you forget that you’re a girl, just like the one you rescued today.”

Not just like the girl we rescued,” Sameera corrected. “The other girl was helpless – I’m not. I have skills… martial arts, self defence, and I have the girls to watch my back. Above and beyond all those, we have Allah. We place our trust in Him, and whatever happens, good or bad, is from Him. Qadaa wa-l Qadr,” she said, referring to the Islamic belief of predestiny.

“Trust in Allah but tie your camel,” Aaminah quoted back. “You know I’m not happy with what you do… won’t you stop? Think of how I feel every time you go out – you could get hurt, you could have an accident, you might get into a fight with someone you can’t beat. There are too many horrible possibilities!”

“Mama, I think you’re exaggerating a little,” Sameera said firmly. “The girls and I don’t go around beating thugs up every day and night – however much we’d like to pretend we are, we aren’t comic book superheroes, and we know it. Most of the time we’re not engaged in anything violent or dangerous, unless you count trying to teach a roomful of hyper kids to be violent and dangerous.” She paused, then continued in a softer voice. “I’ll stop only if you forbid me. I won’t disobey you.”

Aaminah said nothing, just looked at her daughter – at the determined expression on her face, at the somewhat alarming outfit that made her look like a troublemaker but beneath which she knew was a pure and devoted heart. She bit her lip, then sighed.

“I won’t forbid you,” she said finally. “I suppose I know why you do what you do, and even if I don’t like it I know you’re doing something good with the best of intentions… Now go take off your costume and wash up for dinner.”

Sameera grinned in relief and bounded down the stairs to obey her mother’s command. Aaminah stood still, gazing after her daughter, thoughts and emotions roiling inside her head and her heart. Finally, she heaved a sigh, whispered a du’aa for her daughter’s wellbeing, and went back into the kitchen.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

That was AWESOME!!

I wonder how many muslimahs secretly dream of riding bikes dressed in leather and ummm beating up perverts. Huntresses indeed...

Sameera has to have her own novella. Seriously, young muslimahs so need to have their own versions of Sweet Valley and Babysitters' Club and what not. Someone they would want to emulate - they'll get morals and they'll get hijabified leather. How cool is that?

Been following your work on Muslim Matters. Keep up the great work!

sweden1975 said...

"matching leather pants"

“Huntress hijab-ified"

"Muslimah biker chicks"

"Trust in Allah but tie your camel"

ha ha ha, very good, excellent, the Mouse has not lost her touch. I especially admire her fablesse for the witty one-liner.

The only thing I didn't like was:
"however much we’d like to pretend we are, we aren’t comic book superheroes"

It breaks the spell!

But that is a minor matter. Now we are waiting for the in depth character description of the other Huntress hijab-ified Muslimah biker chicks", some bad villains, and more adventures.

Anonymous said...

Sure the "muslimah biker chicks" (I thought muslimahs were not allowed to wear tight clothing) will start out beating on perverts (denying them their civil rights); but then they'll move up the ladder of beating on people not strictly obeying the sharia, even if they are non-muslims. Soon the biker chicks will be abducting and beating women for wearing skirts ala the way the religious police in Iran in Saudi do. In a word: Islamofascism.

Remember, the path to evil starts with one step, and it and all other steps towards Satan are written for you to follow in the Koran...

AnonyMouse said...

Misfit Muslimah:
Thanks! I'm really glad you liked it, considering that (as I said above) it was a very brief writing exercise without much thought put into it and not much editing either. I guess you could call it a rough gem! :P
As for the novella, I would absolutely love to do that! Insha'Allah, once I finish school and have more time I'll be able to sit down and work out something serious with Sameera and her gals :D

Sweden:
Thank you! The "trust in Allah but tie your camel" line is a reference to a Hadith of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).
As for the other girls, it's weird, but I haven't actually paid much thought to them! Sameera burst into existence because she's basically what I've always wanted to be like, so it's easy to describe her character. I'll have to really think about the others, though - I don't want to make them two-dimensional disappointments!

AnonyMouse said...

@ Anonymous:
I'm wondering whether to write a passionate response, a witty comeback, or just dismiss you with a typically teenage roll of the eyes.

A dismissive roll of the eyes it is!
*Rolls eyes*

Anonymous said...

Muslimah biker chicks, eh...isnt that an oxymoron? hmm...*strokes beard*

i'm not sure of too many practicing muslim sisters who'd wanna take on a pervert...let alone do that while projecting a real biker chick image...

nice write-up though.

nuh ibn zbigniew gondek said...

As salaam alaikum.

Thanks for posting this solid piece of writing. I enjoyed it. Come by insha'Allah if you have some time to read. I write about our deen too.

Ma'as salaama,

nuh ibn

Anonymous said...

"Muslimah biker chicks, eh...isnt that an oxymoron? hmm...*strokes beard*

i'm not sure of too many practicing muslim sisters who'd wanna take on a pervert...let alone do that while projecting a real biker chick image.."

All due respect but...Why not? Is there an ayat I'm unaware of that forbids motorycles? Or that tells women not to take an active hand in making the community better?

--Dave, http://parallelsidewalk.wordpress.com

AnonyMouse said...

Aarij:

Actually, it's not that far of a stretch of the imagination... I mean, I can ride my bike in my 'abaayah, so wouldn't it actually be easier to ride a motorcycle? What do you think, Dave?
Plus, Safiyyah (radhiAllahu anha) swiftly killed someone who dared tried to attack the women's tents during one of the battles (I forget which - I think it was Uhud), and there were many Sahaabiyaat who were great fighters (Nusayba bint Ka'b is one of my favourite examples) - I think of my "Muslim biker chicks" as following their example.

:)

Than you, brother Nuh!

Safiya Outlines said...

I zoomed over here after seeing the link on Dave's blog.

I love these stories so much!

Anonymous said...

Salaam,

And I thought you'd lost it =P

Wallahi, I loved reading it sooo much. May Allah bless you for what you've done, and I pray that your efforts never go fruitless... And that you neverlose your touch ;)

Love you
Snowdrops :)

Anonymous said...

on your other blog u seemed so against bike riding in one of your posts (book review i believe).. but here u are ok for it? i think u should pick one view and stick with it ..

just my 2 cents!

Anonymous said...

Rrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

sweden1975 said...

And here is picture of one of the Huntress hijab-ified Muslimah biker chicks when she is not hunting!

Aushi Alzony considers her next move as the Asian Youth Chess Championnship gets under way in Al Ain, United Arab Emirates [AFP]

AnonyMouse said...

Anonymous:

There's a difference between bicycles and motorcycles. On a bicycle, you really work your legs; on a motorcycle you simply sit astide it.
Also, I'm not against biking, per say; it's where it's done. For example, I ride a bicycle in 'abaayah, just not in public... it is, however, sort of difficult to manage it; whereas riding a motorcycle looks (to me) like riding a horse, which I've also done in 'abaayah and is much easier to do (and with the right 'abaayah, covers the legs and everything too).

Admittedly, it does seem like I'm picking and choosing to suit my purposes here, but Allah knows that I think the difference is enough to count... and Allah knows best.

Anonymous said...

‫‬‭‮‪‫‬‭‮҉what is happening here? all my text has gone backwards?

Anonymous said...

Biker chick rides again!

Allahu Akbar...!

Anonymous said...

Good story...

It's always been a dream of mine to ride a motorcycle. *sigh*

My sister and I were seriously about to get our motorcycle licenses a few years ago...until our mother threatened to disown us. I don't really think she would've though. Maybe we'll try again. :)